Inspiration For How to Write Your Wedding Vows
So, you’ve decided to write your own wedding vows. Those spoken words will be the most important, most heartfelt you’ve ever written. It’ll also be the most seen and heard set of words you’ve ever spoken out-loud, in front of a congregation of family and friends. With this in mind, today we’re going to be talking about finding the right kind of inspiration for your wedding vows, so when you do sit down to write them you’ll know you have the right words to inspire you.
Civil or church wedding?
Before you start, be aware that if you’re getting married anywhere other than a church, you’ll need to make sure your wedding vows do not include any religious references. You’ll also have to include the usual statutory declarations ‘I solemnly declare that I know not of any lawful impediment why I …may not be joined in matrimony to….’
Get it all down
You can speak to your registrar before the wedding to make sure your vows contain everything it needs to, and once you have that balance you can then customise it. You could include a poem, a quote from a film, your favourite author or create your own soundbites/quotes.
If you’re getting married in a church you won’t have to worry too much about religious references of course, again however, you will need to include the statutory declarations as mentioned about. Other than any religious references, your church wedding won’t be that different from a civil one, except for the venue.
Don’t gush too much and keep those intimate bits to yourselves
You want it to be honest and sincere, but what you don’t want is to go over the top and be either too intimate or complimentary to the point of awkwardness. If you want to say something that’s intimate and personal, then say it before you arrive at the venue and not during the ceremony.
Whatever your religion it might feel right for you to include some words that are part of your faith, you can then include these with your own original words. As long as it feels comfortable and right for you, it should be in there with your vows.
Talk to your partner and agree about what you’re going to say
The tone of voice needs to feel right to both of you, you don’t have to tell him/her exactly what you’re going to say word for word, but make sure that they have a reasonable expectation there aren’t going to be any uncomfortable surprises, and that you’ve set the right tone. You could write your individual vows together, or you may prefer to write them separately. If you prefer to keep your vows a secret, then keep them to yourself, and just have a conversation about the tone of voice.
Make some notes before you sit down to write
What is there about your relationship with your fiancé that you can reflect on? How did you feel when you first met, what signs where there that told you this was the person you wanted to spend the rest of your life with? There’s a lot of things to think about and should provide you with some inspiration. Think about all the ways you support each other and what you’ve both accomplished together. What do you respect most about your partner and how has your life improved since you met each other?
Your notes are done now, so what next?
What you want to do is put into some kind of structure by writing it all down in order. You could write it as a short story if you wish, to give some shape and then break it down into vows. You want some order to it, so naturally it’ll take some tidying up. Once you’re done, read it aloud to someone you trust, such as a friend or a family member, and then they can give you some feedback.
Finally, if you still have worries regarding your wedding vows, why not get in touch with us here at Pretty White Wedding Planners Scotland. We can help with advice and guidance, in fact if the whole wedding planning thing is starting to make you feel like you want to hide underneath a blanket, give us a call. We know how stressful planning your wedding can be, and if you give us most of the planning to work on with you, you can spend more time on your vows – right?